Lately I believe I am rather obsessed with listening to books on tape. What started as a "novel"
idea to multi-task has turned into living in two worlds simultaneously. It started as a motivator to get tasks done around the house.
But it has turned more serious.
I began to get annoyed at any interruptions. You can imagine with three kids there are many. I pause my ipod, stammer out "What?" answer curtly, and press play once more. Repeat ad nauseum. But this listening didn't stop at housekeeping. This past week I have listened to books while.... driving, grocery shopping, cooking supper, gardening, watching grade school soccer, talking with my children (not impossible).... and yes even talking with my husband. While I am tempted to brag at my ability to multi-task, I admit that I may be taking this a bit far.
I suppose I really started to run into problems when I had conversations and left them having no idea what was said. I know my kids deserve more than such generic answers as... what do you think?, hmmm let me think about that one, I don't know, mmm hmmm, sounds good, and my favourite... ask your dad.
I know that the reason I continue to listen on is not my love of literature (although that is there). It is my escape of the mundane. For the first time in a long while I feel as if I am not just a diaper changer, milk pourer, laundress, but a feeling woman. Not a woman who is a mother or a wife, but a woman who can reach into the world beyond her scope and experience a whole range of feelings without it being attached to my roles. While this may sound positive, I don't want to awaken that desire to negate my current reality.
I guess that is the balance I must implement. Being me, being a mother, and being a wife all at once. Is it possible? Maybe I will turn off the ipod and little more often and just see what happens. Maybe I can make them all reality.
Despite the constant rain and hail storms our garden has stayed remarkably dry. We have raised beds and soil with an abudance of sand. This week, the beans, peas, potatoes, have grown twofold. Some have begun to flower.
